Thou Shalt Not Covet Beads

What better way to start off the morning of Pride than with a trip to the Kemah farmers market. I road tripped over to Laporte to catch a ride with my friend Charlotte down to Kemah. Hotter than a mofo, but we managed to have more than a few laughs while on this shopping extravaganza. The Ghost of Bob Marley sold us some hippy hats which Charlotte got us the teacher discount for.  My hat and bracelet came to a grand total of $17. I handed the Pride of Jamaica $20, then I had to tell him how much change to give me. Please, kids, stay awake in Math class or this will be you one day. Or... just don't smoke your breakfast before going to work.  We finished the morning with a detailed tour of Laporte. I had no idea there was so much to do there(yawn). Main street was a buzz with Pride fever(not). Still I enjoyed my outing(?) with Charlotte and look forward to our next excursion.
Later I stopped by W2W to be the bead fairy, then off to Empire for an afternoon ,then night, of debauchery. They started my day off with a 2010 Empire Cafe Pride t-shirt and some sort of alcohol filled coffee drink. Wow! 4pm and it's time for a Pride stroll down Westheimer. After my stroll I was back on my Empire bar stool. What to drink now? Tony suggested a dirty martini and I agreed since I like anything with the word dirty in it. Double WOW! I was privileged enough to warrant a seat outside with the Empire Pride crew and their swinging families. Mary, Shannon and Cory all had the coolest moms EVER. Families that Pride together stay together is my motto. Mary's mom, Mary V., told me stories about the Sting concert the night before (thanks a lot Mary). Hopefully I can attend a concert with Mary V. and her friends in the future. Conversing with the Slokars and the Pipers was a great kick-off to Pride.

At 7pm we all had our own Pride parade down Westheimer to Mary's brother Cedomil's place. Croatians certainly know how to have a good time, so after another martini and a shot of tequila it was parade time. My mistake was standing at the street barricade. Stupid Drunken Bead Whore and her boyfriend spent the first 30 minutes of the parade hitting me in the back and head while grabbing at flying beads. At one point I looked at her and said "stupid bitch" and her slurred reply was " what bitch?". I contemplated beating the shit out of this skank but decided that jail was not an option, and Pride promotes peace and understanding, so I backed away from the street and showed my Pride in Cedomil's front yard.
I decided to make my way back to Empire for more martinis. Along the route I stopped to talk to friends, students and parents. Nothing like having a PTA meeting during the Gay Pride Parade. Safely back at Empire with my martinis, Jeff entertained me by reading the Houston Press personals aloud. What's a regular Chinese girl? Is there an irregular one? The martinis were clouding my thinking and the parade was over, so I headed home looking forward to another successful Pride celebration in 2011. See y'all next year!

Willie Green, Discovery Green, We're All Green!

Time to redeem my St. Arnold's carriers for precious points. Thursday at Discovery Green , St. Arnold's will give you double points for the carriers you turn in to be recycled, so now my beer account has 50 points in it. I can't wait to go shopping! Since I was wearing my Keep Portland Beered shirt, a lovely, beer drinking couple, Richard and Susan Nelson, stopped to share with me some places to swig beer in Portland and Seattle. Although Richard is an Aggie, and Susan is from Mizzou, they had lived for several years in the Northwest. I'm looking forward to next month when I am in Portland and Seattle, lifting a cup of brew in honor of the Nelsons.

The sky looked ominous, but that didn't deter the drunken crowd from dancing and having a good time as Joe King Carrasco played tunes that took us all down Houston memory lane. All ages were cuttin' a rug under tornadic conditions. It takes more than a little turbulent weather to make Houstonians stop partying and go home. On my way to my bus stop, I stopped to read the sign donated by BP about what a green, wonderful company they are. Ha! That's the funniest thing I've read this summer. Onward to catch the #82 where I met a great downtowner, Willie Green. He has lived downtown for 14 years and is a native Houstonian. He was well versed in the law and spent quite awhile explaining to me the difference between a class c misdemeanor and a felony. In fact Willie told me he had just gotten out of the city jail for a class c misdemeanor which was for enjoying a few beers on the streets of Houston. Po po don't like that shit! Hide your beer unless you are stumbling out of a swanky Main St. club then the po po looks the other way. Average citizens like me and Willie will be sent to the big house for having a little public fun. He shared with me the pros and cons of city, county and state lock-ups. What an eye opening education I received from Mr. Green. I think I'll do my darndest to be a law abiding citizen because no incarceration sounds like a picnic to me. I liked Willie and will have to talk to him in the future. His parting pearls of wisdom were to stay away from those Pierce Elevated folks because they is crazy! Amen Brother Green.

Will Road Trip for Peaches...and Beer

Nothing says summer like a road trip to Fredericksburg,TX. My friends On Golden Pond were dying for some fresh peaches, so that gave me a good reason to make a run for the Hill Country. With orders in hand, I loaded up the Jeep and hit the road. I was helping Blur sing Girls & Boys when I realized I had taken the wrong exit off of I-10. Oh well, surely this road will hit Highway 71 somewhere up ahead, and, besides my favorite song Drunk Girls by LCD Soundsystem was on and needed my full attention. It's so hard to clap and steer at the same time. I'm pretty secure in being lost, since I've spent a good portion of my life in this state and have lived to tell about it. Sure enough, I found the road to Austin after a few(dozen)miles.
Had to stop At Ruta Maya in Austin for a latte. I talked to the coolest barista named Nathan. He lamented about the fact that Austin had gotten a little too commercialized over the past 10 years. He also talked about why we call it an "alarm" clock instead of something a little more soothing. The world has gotten faster, which Nathan and I think is sad, so I grabbed my latte and ran to my Jeep! I am 100% American and proud of it.
Got to Fredericksburg and stopped at Silver Creek for lunch. There was a local songstress serenading the customers. All of a sudden, she quits playing her guitar, stands up and yells "OMG! I'm in pain! It's my period!" Don't hold back sister. Gloraline then grabbed her tip jar and went inside for a beer. Who could blame her? Later I headed out to Chisholm Trail Winery where I imparted the story of Gloraline to the Wine Mistress. I thought she was going to pee her britches and I got a nice laugh retelling the tale myself. Everyone is happy in the Hill Country. Wine Mistress recommended the Crossroads Saloon for a drink. You don't have to tell me twice, so I headed back in town to check this place out. I had a great bartender named Jon who could pour a mean Pinot Noir. I struck up a conversation at the bar with John and Susan Hever from Johnson City. They told me the best place to buy peaches, and also told me stories about drinking wine with Lyndon and Lady Bird Johnson's youngest daughter, Lucy. The Hevers brought a tear to my eye when they said that the highway from Johnson City to LBJ's ranch in Stonewall was lined with people on both sides to pay respect to Lady Bird when she was taken home to be buried. We then toasted the Best First Lady Ever! John raises longhorns and asked me if I knew anyone that wanted to buy one. I said my friend Ashley wanted one. I forgot to mention that she was a crazy Aggie and would use that poor steer for target practice. The Hevers rolled out to a party, and I rolled out to another bar. I then drank wine at Lincoln St. with the manager, Danny, and some unnamed strange guy that appeared out of nowhere and talked about Idaho for 2 hours. Maybe I was slightly inebriated...maybe not.

After peach shopping the next afternoon, I decided to make a detour home and tour the Real Ale Brewery in Blanco, TX. What a treat. It was nice to see the place full of drunks at 2pm on a work day. Gabrielle, the Mistress of Brew, was serving up wonderful samples of Real Ale as fast as she could. I always support Texas and Arkansas breweries. OK, I support any brewery but Real Ale is definitely in my top 5 .This road trip was a success, and I'm hoping The Ponders will ask me to go back this summer for more peaches...and beer..