Sunday, August 14, 2011

Stare Lake City





School will be starting soon, and I haven't had a real vacation yet since I have no $$$. Have Mastercard, will travel, so I pulled out the map and decided to go west young woman. Utah was a cheap flight, and right next door to Preston, Idaho, the home of Napoleon Dynamite, so I decided that Idaho would be my final destination.
A firm believer in getting by with a little help from my friends, I boarded the plane already high on hydrocodone. I had busted my ass at the bowling alley the day before, resulting in my right arm being placed in a splint to help alleviate the pain. The brilliant doctor gave me a prescription for Celebrex(?) which I said to hell with since I knew my biker/baby boomer friends would have better pain killers for my trip. Definitely better living through modern chemistry. But no amount of drugs could save me from the one year old and her pregnant mommy sitting next to me for the three hour flight. OMG...where's my pills? I survived the flight, barely, then it was off to explore beautiful Salt Lake City. Of course, I knew that SLC was Mormon Town, but I wasn't prepared for an episode of Sister Wives. Everyone was white with at least five kids. No one spoke, they just S...T...A...R....E...D  at you. I can't remember the last time I felt soooooo uncomfortable. I called a friend of mine who warned me that the Mormons were going to take over the world, and to get out of Utah as fast as I could. I think she's on to something, so the next day I hightailed it over to Park City. Upon arrival, I immediately found a place at the bar at the Wasatch Brewery. Susie and Kevin the bartenders and Brady the realtor told me that SLC was freakville and Park City was the place to be. So true! Brady told me that even ex-porn star, Harry Reems, lived a semi-peaceful existence in Park City. This town rocked. Beer was good and people were friendly. All tanked up on beer, I decided I needed some whiskey to take my pills with. The High West Distillery was my next perch. Amanda was my gracious bartender. She was originally from North Carolina but had been in Park City for about ten years. She, too, was a little afraid of SLC, and had noticed that those people have a staring problem. She was great fun, and told me that she really liked her marijuana. I can't remember how the subject even came up, but I do remember Amanda was positively giddy when discussing this topic with me.
Enough of Utah, so next day onward to Idaho the birthplace of Sarah Palin. I highly recommend Park City for a fun vacation. Go see Temple Square in Stare Lake City, then get out of town as quickly as possible. Next blog will be about flippin' sweet tater tot country...I LOVE IDAHO!!!

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